... Two Lines a Day Relief of Maf eking Reunion Let us respect this small and dwindling band Themselves, and for the thing for which they stand. These were not heroes of some total war, Nor unmatched since, unparalleled before In might of numbers, novelty of skill But honest men in a small siege. Yet still The name remains in unforgetting speech And to our children mafficking will teach, Where ...

... Two Lines a Day The Derby The Derby of which the key-note is hearty Is a traditional national party Where many forms of moderate iniquity Have the sanction of antiquity and ubiquity Gambling, begging, welshing, thieving And, to an unprecedented degree, litter- leaving. Here half-a-million assorted clowns Oscillate between the ups and the Downs, At stated intervals turning excited faces To ...

... Two Lines a Day Eton Fourth of June On the Fourth of June Etonians sing the Boating Tune (I know that should be Song But the rhyme was wrong). Speeches in Upper School Are said to be the rule, The whole is a major spree In honour of King George III Where Oppidan embraces Colleger. The rest is second-hand-knowledger So I shouldn't record it. It's merely my intuition That the parents regard ...

... Two Lines a Day Royal Ascot Ascot, which marks the apogee Of milliner, of hosier; Which means to you (but not to me) Of course, the Royal Enclosure; Where Englishmen can play the snob As Englishmen think proper And let the adulating mob Admire the cool grey topper; Where men are fancied for their birth And horses for their training But women triumph by their Worth Except if it is raining; ...

... Two Lines a Day Midsummer Now how early does it seem: Comes what was our winter's dream, Comes so quick and goes so soon. After this is afternoon, Though a while pretend we may That it's still the peak of day. Summer's highest note is sung; Summer now, not old, not young, Holds brief magic in her prime; This is Summer's witching time This the year's green-wanded spell. Poising on light-pausing ...

... Two Lines a Day Wimbledon Centre-court, Court I, Court II See the bobby-soxers queue At the exits, on the stairs, Hunting autographs in pairs. Do they, when they're safe in bed, Keep the album 'neath their head Prompting them to night-long dreams Of seeded players and ice-creams Is the heaven in their faces One in which they, too, serve aces Win the match-point, hear the cheers And leap the ...

... Two Lines a Day Test Match Vou would think that the Tesi Is to find out who is best At a particular form of sport. It is nothing of the sort. It's to provide men in pubs, At dinner-parties, in clubs, In the papers, on the air, At the cinema, everywhere, With a subject of conversation Within their powers of ratiocination. All the winter through They have had to make do With Religion, Poetry, ...

... Two Lines a Day Royal Henley Regatta Henley is not in Bucks, or Berks, but Oxon, Placed there, undoubtedly, to rhyme with coxwain And by association with the latter Firmly to fix one's mind on her Regatta; Henley, highwater of aquatic sport Of river-nymphs, like Phyllis, holding Court, Of launches, lunches, flannel pants and punts Where ancient oarsmen with their critic grunts Regurgitate that ...

... Two Lines a Day International Horse Show Here are horses, Not racecourses. Curvetting, Not betting. Riders, Not outsiders. Skill, Not a cheap thrill. Paces, Not races. Sleek coats, Not Totes. I mean It's clean. Justin Richardson ft A ...

... Two Lilies a Day Cowes Others I know have more than fully dealt with The tense expectancy before the gun, Have worked upon their readers till these felt with The very crews themselves the fears, the fun; More skilful pens than mine have limned the gunwales Searing the Solent's emerald and things, The binnacles, the barnacles, the funnels No, hardly funnels spoken of white wings Of bellying ...

... Two Lines a Day August Bank Holiday Bank Holiday's A jolly day Though the word Bank 's Not one that engenders thanks. The populace Forgetting its proper place Presumably the tenement Settles like sediment Over everything beautiful. Do not be snootiful; You probably had an ancestoi Who came from Manchester And your descent shows traces Of both belts and braces. Justin Richardson m. ...

... Two Lines a Day Grouse Shooting It isn't nice To find a pellet In grouse, or grise Whichever way you spell it; Your denture May come to grief. (Sorry, I meanture Own teef.) But however unpleasant For you, it is not Half as bad as for the pheasant (Or was it grouse? I forgot;) He thinks it, my friend, The absolute end. Justin Richardson ...